A list of excuses over the past few weeks. I’ve unfortunately had to suffer through all of them because What Else Is New…?
I was out of town over Thanksgiving, so I didn’t know!
I didn’t have email where I was, so I didn’t know!
We have WHAT due on Wednesday?? I didn’t know!
You mean we have to cite EVERYTHING we used in our paper? I didn’t know!
HOW many pages did it have to be?? I didn’t know!
I wasn’t in class on Monday. What did I miss? I missed WHAT? But…But I didn’t know!
We have a final essay in class, too? I didn’t know!
I’m failing?? What assignments? I didn’t know!
Plagiarized? I have a Works Cited page! What do you mean, “citations in my paper”? But…But I didn’t know!
I’m not allowed to use my sister and cousin as sources?? I didn’t know!
What MLA citation quiz? There was a quiz?? I didn’t know!
I can’t write about legalizing pot? What “forbidden topics” list? I didn’t know!
My family’s leaving for vacation, but we’re reviewing our rough drafts then…? I didn’t know!
THAT was 25% of my grade?? I didn’t know!
What are your office hours? They’re on the syllabus? I didn’t know!
How do I check out a book from the library? No, I didn’t know!
What’s a database? (I didn’t know!)
We had to submit WHAT by WHEN?? (*practically screeching* I. DIDN’T. KNOW!)
But I have citations AND a Works Cited page, so how did I plagiarize? Summarizing? Paraphrasing? I just copied what they wrote! I didn’t know!
What syllabus? (Hey, I didn’t know!)
On the bright side, my dad was kind enough to leave the rest of the bottle of Bombay Sapphire and a bit of vermouth behind. I think I may have olives left, too.